Roughly two years ago, I started to get NYC firmly stuck in my head -- now it rests firmly on my head until a rush of wind carries it away. Dreams are the most wonderous things: much like a loosely fitting hat they too can get torn away in a mere twirling of the air.
Chasing dreams to me is akin to chasing cars: they're quite sure to get away unless you have the steering wheel. I am now actually writing one of two books I have planned, tuesdays and thursdays are reserved for this exercise, right after coming home from work. There is nothing stirring me on; rather, it is actually me having to fuel this dream with time, dedication, and discipline. Sounds less glamourous than promises of fame, right?! But it may just get me there rather than my mere chasing of dreams getting me away from here.
Gute Fahrt!

here you should see me getting all jacked up on caffeine

this is me walking away, kinda sorta

sup yo

a detail with some clashing patterns

oh, look!

boots in a corner



Less than ten years ago...

...I got many a comment claiming that my sex wasn't all that clear! „Are you a girl or a boy?“ I heard often! I did my part, but, not consciously! Only about a month ago someone on the tube shouted at me by calling me „Tussi“, meaning as much as „Sloane Ranger“! I have come a long way, baby! My past me wouldn't have thought much of my present me! Boring and dull! But, oh, has my life won in color and tonal richness! My life is by far less excitng and less adventurous! Less cool parties to attend (via guest list, of course, darling) Less celebrities to admire from up close, less dreams to chase! More challenges to face head-on! In a strange way my life has gained authenticity over and above everything else! Which is odd as back then, I would have sworn to lead the real life: any dull and boring life would be ridden with escapism and delusions! Not so! Well, let me tell you, my prayer has been to live a REAL life! I never wanted Disney christianity! I wanted the pain and drama. Yet, death HAS lost its sting! Any challenge, no matter how terrible, has one common theme: ME! I am in it, not simply observing my life as though it were someone else's! I have become the protagonist of my life! Before, it was many a people's opinions being the author of my life! Now it is mine! Strange! Jesus says, whoever loses his life will save it! Losing more and more of my former me, as daunting as it sometimes seems, brings with it a profit like none other! Riches like peace can be bought for no treasure in this world! I would still give everything for this incredible gift!

invisible friend and me

a picture from way up

acting up a bit

back to behaving

properly and cultivatedly

a detail

tell me more!

shiny detail

nude jacket, shirt, and necklace: HandM 2003
skirt: Abercrombie & Fitch
bracelets: dorfyluts and HandM
tights: awesomeness aka TKMaxx
spectator shoes: Loake



old man rambling

ok friends a challenge has been issued not the first one today but certainly the oddest i get to write the headline news for this post so let me just disappoint you from the getgo i have nothing to say about the pictures below i don't know where they were taken or what they depict and thus cannot enlighten your gaze in any way the fact that they are quite TEH AWESOME will not elude you if you look at them so why don't you just do that and don't bother reading if you are still with me here goes i am supposed to provide you with insights into my experience of the social realm i guess this is one way to phrase it well well how about this dear friends and family i can't stand it it physically repulses me to be amongst people whith convention dictating some sort of interaction why is that oh mr weirdo you may ask and what should i tell you about reasons the above is your prime example i disappoint i am a habitual disappointer ha and mind you this sentiment most certainly is not an expression of humility dear lord no for it is firmly based in pride the most reprehensible kind too because i have seen the humans and i have heard them and i for the life of me cannot relate to them and boy isn't that pathetic well there you go i hope you're happy oh yeah check this and regret reading or in one case asking and now don't be too creeped out and enjoy this:

tingly things

a picture that is quite ok

more of that

yet another good picture



a study in white

hey there

a detail from where i live

me looking outside

and looking in

more whiteness

whiteness from a different angle



making pretty things

How to get this garment? simple! surely you have an undershirt that has seen better days? dye it in fabric dye, bought for €2,20. Make sure all the residue is completely gone before proceeding! then, take an antique handkerchief, mine was a little stained from who-knows-what! so i dipped it in coffee, which leaves a really nice caramel color! You can use tea, too! even red tea for a different color! then simply cut your handkerchief in half ( i didnt go diagonal, as i didn't want to destroy the pattern in the corners) and stitch it to your shirt. bingo, now wear your shirt with a skinny little belt wrapped around you!

this is me in the result

what you get is what you see

the result of the process


we work with this

this is how we start



nouveau realisme

cross-faded is PRETTY huge right now! well, the hard-core realism provided by use of the old fashioned top-flash is soon countering the present blur. Raw and upclose is on the up!

on a chair

something else

on the floor


Jacket: HandM 2003
Tshirt: HandM 2009
Necklace: I did that!
Leggings: Gina Tricot
Earrings: my friend made that!



friend of mine and me


red dress

a bird




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